Parents should not rush to ‘get over’ the sadness that often accompanies the back-to-school season. Sadness is a natural biological response to loss, an emotion often associated with significant events like breakups, job loss, or death. Yet, it also arises during everyday transitions, such as a child’s first day of school or when an adult child departs for college.
The article highlights that societal expectations often misinterpret sadness as a flaw or a sign of weakness, particularly for men who may face cultural stigma for expressing such feelings. Recognizing that sadness is not a problem to be solved but a signal for emotional processing can protect both mental and physical health. Research indicates that acknowledging sadness can reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression.
Experts recommend using the Change Triangle, a method developed by David Malan, to navigate sadness. This framework aids in reconnecting with core emotions after they’ve been suppressed by inhibitory feelings like guilt or shame. The article outlines steps to validate and release sadness, including naming the emotion, noticing its physical manifestations, exploring its impulses, and using it constructively.
For instance, when a parent feels sad due to a child’s absence, it’s important to acknowledge these feelings and seek support from partners or friends. This approach prevents unintentional guilt towards children and fosters healthier emotional expression, strengthening family bonds. The article concludes by emphasizing that sadness is a teacher and a tool for connection, encouraging parents to embrace it as part of the journey of raising children.